Back on TV and in the NY Times
Just a quick note to say we're popping up all over the place - this is kinda fun! We were featured by Lisa Belkin in her NY Times Motherlode blog yesterday, along with several other authors. It was great to have our book introduced as Lisa's first grandchild (grandbook?). We were sad to see so much of the conversation in the comments once again focused on equal task sharing (never mind exact 50/50 division of every task), but frankly we're a bit too busy right now to fire up the ol' rebuttal machine (perhaps more on that in a later post). Hopefully all of you wonderful readers know this is hardly the case.
Then, this morning we got to hang out with New England Cable Network and do a 5-minute live segment on ESP, which you can watch here.
I read the Motherlode blog as well and was "equally" :) disappointed that she and the commentators were so focused on whether "equality" is desirable and on the concept of task division and did not give your book more credit (maybe Lisa was looking to stir up the debate?). I think unfortunately this is a byproduct of the process of untangling thousands of years of patriarchy where there is still on a societal level distrust, conflict & oppression between men and women and a lot of misguided & dysfunctional gender programming still in place? I hope we are in the process of untangling this more and more every day, though. And some structuralism is necessary to do that.
There is a great book called "The Gender Knot" that explains how patriarchy is socialized and has some suggestions for detangling it.
Glenn Sacks had a negative reaction to the Belkin article here: http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=4498
Now, I'm familiar enough with you guys to know that some of the criticisms are off-base, but I think there's a trap this could fall into.
Probably the "easiest" pitch for this book is a way to get Dad to get off the couch and do some damn dishes, which is the path Belkin takes in her opening paragraphs.
This will probably maximize sales, but minimize its effectiveness. "Mad at Dad" Moms will buy the book, order their husbands to read it, and the husbands will either page through it lightly or just hope it blows over.
In any instance, I think you should as much as possible emphasize the benefit to fathers as well, in order to have a real impact.
I'm hijacking the comments here even though Marc wrote this entry - but I must say 'Amen!' to the warning. We don't relish the idea that we have to refute the lazy-guy angle over and over, but we will do so until we no longer have to. We hammer this home in our book so often that I'm wondering if those women you mention will regret their purchase. We need our message to reach the many, many men and women who are motivated by creating partnerships that work for both of them - and we're not going after the 'get your man to do more' crowd.
Great comment, and great tip for our next book read! Thank you!
So glad to catch you on NECN last week. I had no idea about your website or book until then. But, listening to the two of you on NECN struck a chord with me. Loving the book on our Kindle!
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